Before I begin, I just need to get something out.
“Knock it off, Napoleon! Make yourself a dang quesaDILLA!”
Okay, I feel better. And not just because I got to start my Monday cooking post with a movie line. I feel better because of these quesadillas, which are everything to me. They’re all that’s wonderful, good, and holy about quesadillas, but with a breakfast twist. And you can serve ’em up on a plate with sour cream and pico de gallo as you would for regular quesadillas…or you can just throw wedges at your loved ones as they head out the door. They’re highly portable!
I took a bacon-and-egg approach, but you can change it up and use cooked breakfast sausage or even chorizo, which would be divine.
Let’s go make ourselves a dang quesadilla! Grandma would have wanted it that way.
If you haven’t ever seen Napoleon Dynamite, this headnote might be a little confusing.
And please go watch it today. The secrets of the universe are contained within.
Cut a pack o’ bacon in half…
And fry it up until it’s just starting to crisp.
Set it aside on a paper towel, and try—this will be difficult, but do try—not to eat it all before it’s time to assemble the quesadillas.
Next, pour off all the grease…
But don’t clean the skillet! If you do you’ll regret it every day for the rest of your lives!
Next, dice up some onion and bell pepper: I had this orange one, but a mix of red, yellow, and green would be pretty.
Then seed a jalapeno and dice it up.
You can leave out the jalapeno if it frightens you in a breakfast setting.
Jalapenos never frighten me in any setting, though. I want a little pain when I eat. Makes me feel alive!
Melt a little butter in the dirty and delicious skillet over high heat…
Then throw in the veggies!
Cook ’em around until they’re nice and golden brown and starting to get soft…
Then remove ’em to a plate and set ’em aside.
Crack the eggs into a bowl…
Splash in a little half-and-half…
And add salt and pepper.
Poke all the egg yolks to break the membranes…
And whip ’em until the mixture is totally smooth.
Now, turn the heat down to low and melt a leetle more butter in the same skillet.
Pour in the eggs…
Then use a spatula…
To push the eggs around the skillet as they cook.
This right here is how my father-in-law likes his scrambled eggs.
I like ’em a little more done myself. Turn off the heat and set ’em aside when they’re done.
Pico de gallo is a must with quesadillas! Chop up a bunch of tomatoes…
Onions…
And cilantro.
Then dice up a seeded jalapeno…
And slice a lime in half.
Combine all the ingredients in a bowl and squeeze in the lime juice, then sprinkle in a little salt.
Then stir it around until it’s all combined.
And of course, because I love them truly, madly, and deeply, slice a couple of avocados in half…
Scoop out the good stuff…
And cut it into slices.
Now it’s quesadilla time! Plop a small flour tortilla on a buttered skillet or griddle and top it with cheese.
Spoon some of the veggie mixture on top…
Then top it with a nice layer of scrambled eggs.
And next? A circle of bacony goodness…
Another layer of cheese…
And a second tortilla.
Then just let it go over low heat until the bottom layer of cheese is melted.
Meanwhile, get another quesadillas going. For this one, I used a whole wheat tortilla.
Layer of scrambled eggs…
On this one, I did a circle of avocado. Yum!
Another layer of cheese…
A layer of the veggies, then throw on the top tortillas.
Flip both quesadillas and keep cooking on low/medium-low heat until the cheese is all melted and you can’t go another minute without sinking your teeth into these gorgeous creations.
Use a pizza cutter to slice the quesadilla into quarters.
Beautimous!
To serve ’em up, plop a dollop of sour cream in the middle…
Followed by a pile of pico.
This is life right here.
Here’s the whole wheat version, which means it has no calories.
In my mind.
These are so rich and filling, one or two wedges is enough for most hom*o sapiens. And they’re portable!
Garsh, this looks good.
Tastes even mo’ better!
Here’s the handy printable:
